It’s 5:30 a.m. and the phone is ringing again. Mike is so exhausted he doesn’t hear this time and I don’t hear his sister stirring, either. This is an answer to prayer because I want them to be able to rest. I get up to take the early morning shift. I’m not quick enough and the answering machine is getting it, but I’m not concerned. It will ring again and as I reach the bottom of the stairs, it starts. I’m thankful he’s forgotten about the cell phones. Mike’s is in the bedroom and it’s jolted him awake several times already. “Hello?” I answer. “Uh, well…uh, is this Mike?” “No, Dad. It’s Donna.” “Can I talk to Mike?” “No, Dad. It’s 5:30 and he’s in bed. He needs to sleep and I’m not waking him up.” “Oh. Uh. Well, do you have a minute?” “Yes, Dad,” and I sit on the stairs. It will be a while. “I’m completely bewildered. I can’t find Anne.” “No, Dad. She died.” “Who died.” “Mom died.” “My mother?” “No, Mike’s mother. Anne. Your Anne has died.” “My mother, Anne?” “No, Dad. Your wife.” His mother’s name was not Anne. “My wife?” “Yes.” “How did that happen.” “Her lungs wore out, Dad.” “Where was I?” “You were holding her hand.” “Here in the house?” “Yes, Dad, the apartment. You were holding her hand, I was reading the psalms to her, and Mike was stroking her hair.” “Did she suffer?” “No, Dad. It was peaceful.” “Why can’t I remember?” “Your memory has been bad for a few years, now.” He will accept this from me. He called Mike a liar last night. “I can’t remember any of this.” “I know.” “Is Mother with you?” “No, Dad. She died.” “Was there a funeral?” “No, Dad. It will be Friday.” “What day is today?” “It’s Wednesday.” “What should I do?” “Go back to bed, Dad.” “I found a note here. Did something happen?” “Mom’s gone, Dad.” “I have to go get her.” “You can’t, Dad. She’s died. We’ll have a private viewing today. Your daughter came to town yesterday and spent the day with you and we’re going to go see Mom one last time.” “When?” “At 11 o’clock.” “Will I go?” “Yes, Dad. We’ll come get you.” “Has there been a funeral?” “Not yet.” “Has something happened?” And on it goes for another five minutes or so. Suddenly he’s done and hangs up. I go to make a cup of coffee and clean up the kitchen a bit. The phone rings.
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July 2024
Donna KemperDonna Kemper put aside her art career to care for a mother she hadn't seen in over a decade. For seven years she followed her mother's journey into dementia, caring for her and putting forgiveness into action. Categories
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